Aug 252008

New research from an institute in Switzerland suggests that breakthroughs in quantum computing could help in that most cutting edge of computer usage, browsing the Web.

Users of modern computers are able to edit and process many channels of audio and video simultaneously and compile programs whilst also using the computer for word processing, DTP and other activities. However, the next step – using a computer to look at more than half a dozen Web pages without the browser crashing or the computer crawling to a halt – has eluded the world’s top scientists until now.

But now a team of mathematicians and nuclear physicists at the Notwendigenanpassungenvornehmen Institute in Bern has calculated that a server farm of as little as 500 military-grade computers using quantum processing may be able to run a browser capable of accessing as many as 24 Web pages and remain stable in laboratory conditions for up to half an hour.

“The team has worked very hard on this matter”, declared the spokesman, Prof. Wilhelm Verarschung. “The technology required will probably not be available for 20 years yet, but it offers hope that a stable yet capable Web browser might be achievable in the not-too-distant future”. He added: “Sooner, if someone manages to come up with some decent verdammt software”.

Responses from the Web authoring community to this news have been mixed, ranging from “Server unresponsive” to “ASP error”. Many of the Web’s most cutting-edge sites have already declared that the new quantum technology will not be supported, and that you should try upgrading to the latest of Flash. Even if you just did. Twice.

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